Starting May 17, 2104, all our Blog posts have moved over to our sister site:
This site will be redirected to inspiredlivingmedical.com as well and soon this page will cease to exist as it is. However, all our awesome content will still be available!
Have a great week and be sure to check out our new look at www.inspiredlivingmedical.com
If you just want to see the blogs, you can select that category, if you want the general information with the weekly meditations, you can select that too!
Have you ever met someone who you just instantly got along with? You just seemed to “get” each other and conversation just flowed effortlessly between you. Have you ever met someone with whom the conversation is awkward and difficult?
People communicate in 3 different ways, Visually, Auditory, or Kinaesthetically (VAK) and we all have a preferred style.
When we communicate with people with the same style/ process as us, it flows, and when we communicate with someone of a different process, it can be more difficult. Really good communicators are able to match the style of the person who they are speaking with.
Are you living the life you WANT to live? Are you living the life that matters to YOU? Often, the automatic response is “Yes, of course I am!”
Unfortunately this is a “knee-jerk” response that we come up with because, honestly, it can be really uncomfortable to sit with the fact that our actions are not in line with our values.
Even the most “enlightened” will unintentionally veer off the path of valued living.
The question is, how do we know where we went wrong?
On the highway of life everyone gets to drive their own bus. we get to decide how fast to go, and which direction to go. The problem is, the bus comes with a bunch of passengers… and they are ALL BACKSEAT DRIVERS!!!!
This Bus Metaphor comes from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy - a therapy developed by Steven C. Hayes. The Bus is a metaphor for our internal experience (or mind). We are the drivers and it is our bus – we generally we have a plan – a schedule for where we are going to go and how fast we’ll get there, usually with the idea to move towards the things that matter to us.
Unfortunately, part of being human means that we also have thoughts, feelings, urges, beliefs and impulses that get in the way of us moving towards what we want. These are our passengers.
Have you ever tried to live a value and failed? Me too! And this is true for EVERY person you know, it is just part of the human condition.
As humans we are so prone to setting goals and NOT following through that we have decades of science dedicated towards figuring out why and how we can set ourselves up for success.
So what trips us up?
In order for any behaviour to change we all have to go through the same process….
As humans, we all hate uncertainty, whether it is not knowing where we stand in a relationship or what will happen to an ailing parent or if we will get paid in time to pay our bills this month. The content will be different for everyone, but our response is the same- STRESS!
We often do all sorts of things to try get rid of that feeling or to distract ourselves from it – sleeping, texting, drinking, eating, worrying about things we can’t control, focusing on the past or future, sex, working too much, etc.
There are couple of simple things that can help us create certainty even in the face of uncertain situations- in a healthy way. Make your good deed for the day to try these for yourself and Pay It Forward- share this information so others can too!
Think of a “sticky” subject for you. One where you feel yucky or weaker whenever it comes up or something that you keep thinking about.
It could be how you talk to yourself about your accomplishments, a death of a loved one, or maybe it is when you think about an ex-partner, a friend or job. It may even be just about something that is going on in your life right now, for example for me, the topic that inspired this post for me was about the move to the new office.
Ok, so now you have your thought, and strong and healthy you knows there is something about this subject that feels not healthy.
Let’ s see if we are being flexible or stuck?
1. We have adapted the Learning for Life initiative.
- Any person or group (including schools or classes) with an idea to improve or inspire their community, no matter how young or old, can apply for up to $500
- You just need to submit a request with a description of the project and the expected budget.
We look forward to your inspiring ideas!
2. Due to limited interest, we will be stopping our Mentor of the Month program.
Has something ever happened to you that you just didn’t want to, or flat out refused to accept? How did that work out for you? Did it change things in the end?
We hear more and more that “we just have to accept our circumstances” – but what does that mean? And why do people say that? How will that make our life better?
You’ve heard the old saying, “Nice Guys Finish Last”… right? Well, there is some truth to that statement. In fact, searching the web I found all sorts of interesting articles.
Gregory Ciotti wrote a particularly interesting post recently about how and why nice guys earn less money… it’s worth the read.
Today we’re going to take a bit different look at the consequences of being “nice”.